easy, or right?

i can't, of course, speak for your life specifically, but i know our society has this tendency to think that i something is right, if it is meant to be, then it will be easy, that it will happen all right and tidy, all clean-cut and prompt. so when things go haywire, it throws us off. a lot. maybe so severely that it shakes our faith inGod, or love, or humanity. and things that are not of primary importance can end up ruling our lives. this seeming-simple fallacy, that what is right or even just what we want should be "easy" can cause such devastation: divorce, apostasy, bitterness, alienation from God and man.
we, as a family, as a couple, as human beings, are learning a lot on this our farm. definitely the hardest lesson we have been learning is that what is right is not always easy. we have run into one hardship after another. we had a sweet mortgage deal that fell through because of the appraisal, and the only bank that would give us a loan turned the screw to the very last degree. so we didn't have any extra cash to do those little projects like, oh, you know, putting heat in the house. taking down the barbed wire, after nynkie had torn up her fetlock on it, has been proving a massive, exhausting ordeal involving huge honeysuckle vines, poison oak, and enormous thorn bushes. we have been very cold.
and yet, with all of these trials. . . my boys are so happy. they are growing up with the understanding that "something to do" means *doing* something. they are caring for animals, learning how to teach and train and bond with them. they are not afraid of dark, or cold, or rain, or dogs, or even horses that are several tens of times bigger than they. the can run wild outside. they can catch chickens, gather eggs, carry hay, and dump grain into buckets.
living in a city can be super awesome. there can be so much to do and see and explore. part of me really, really misses being able to meander about downtown . . . until i go outside and start fixing things on my property, improving land and fences and moving towards self-sufficiency. it's amazing! hard, so hard, but so so so good and beautiful and true and right. it is tangible proof that God works at such a different speed, only we in our impatience get so angry that He isn't doing everything that we want Him to so, the way we think it ought to be done, RIGHT NOW. but His primary concern is our soul, not our house or job or car. He wants me to be faithful to Him because I love Him, not because He is like some giant coke machine where i do X and pray Y and obtain exactly what i want: to love Him for His sake, not for mine.
now i'd better go feed . . .