an update for T

we are continuing the arduous process known commonly as "settling in" . . . unpacked more boxes today; now all that is left are some pictures to hang and some books for which to acquire another shelf. progress, indeed! we are having our first company on saturday: a momentus occasion, and i am worried about my desire for as near-perfect presentation as possible colliding with my severe physical limitations. of course, in this case, the body must needs win.
i found a ballet studio that i want to inquire more closely into. it is within walking distance. in fact, finn and i walked by it the other day; i mosied into the building, trying to seem oh-so-nonchalant, but when i saw that the studio is on the FOURTH floor, i looked at my todder, my stroller, and my belly, and retreated. maybe in a few months. although, i am certain that regular dance would help everything, and so am trying to compensate (and maintain my balance) my doing at least a few plies and stretches at home. i won't tell you how often i am able to accomplish that very simple (and helpful) goal.
today, i spent quite a bit of time running errands and cleaning house, with the end result of having nothing for dinner when my darling husband came home. FAIL stamped itself in large letters across the front of my forehead. thank God, my husband, my dearest one, is such a kind and gracious man. we ordered pizza with pancakes for Finn and all was well. still, i cannot at all shake the conviction that my priorities were slightly disordered. on the other hand, pleading again those aforementioned physical limitations . . .
this babe will be here in a few weeks. not months, but weeks. i am not quite sure what to do about that. it seems a far, far more daunting task than i can think about preparing for adequately. heck, i can't even think about it without shrinking into denial. not even the desire to have my body and waist back urge me towards over-eager anticipation. i am scared. there it is, in black and white, and i'll keep admitting it.
9:00 = Pumpkin Time: I am one tired momma. in closing:
this week, overall, has been fairly mundane, neither good nor bad, better or worse than usual. in the not unpleasant monotony, however, i have found myself enjoying the company of my son. he's great! funny, helpful (usually), easy to please (most of the time), and so excited to explore the world and life in general. everything is exciting, and his joy gives me such pleasure. and if he's a bit difficult when tired, i am the last person with any room for impatience in that regard! but what a novel thing. i don't remember hearing about this too often: that one's children, even now, when the demands still often outweigh the giving, our children can be *chums*.